Accentuate the Positive



Overheard on a weblog . . .
. . . discussing the sophistication of various peace initiatives for resolving Israel-Palestine enmity:

United Nations "Partition Plan" to the Palestinians (1947):
You are going to have 47% of the 100% which was originally yours.

"Oslo Agreement" with the Palestinians (1993):
You are going to have 22% of the 100% which was originally yours.

Barak's "Generous Offer" to the Palestinians (1999):
We are going to give you 95% of 22% of 100% of the land, which was originally yours.

Gorgonzola'd

Sharon's "Peace Plan" for the Palestinians (2000):
We are going to give you 42% of 95% of 22% of 100% of the land, which was originally yours, and this 42% will remain under continuous curfew.

"American Zionists" to the Palestinians (since the 1880s):
According to our version of the Bible you are entitled to 0% of 42% of 95% of 22% of 100% of the land, which was originally yours.

The "Road Map" for the Palestinians that Bush envisions by 2005:
If you stop your resistance to the occupation (which we call terrorism), and if your refugees give up their right of return to their ancestral homes, and you agree to only elect officials acceptable to US and Israeli administrations, you agree to lock up all your resistance fighters, and you agree to outlaw all Palestinian movements and organizations that appose US/Israeli policies, and you agree to drive your cars only on roads that Sharon assigns for your use, and you do not object to the 'wall' that Sharon is building, and you agree not to claim Jerusalem as your capital, and you agree that your children's school curriculum only includes courses and books approved by the Israeli government, and you agree not to give birth to more than three children per family, and you become more tolerant to Israeli settlers who are confiscating your homes and lands because they are doing it out of religious belief that they are fulfilling Godís promise, and you accept Israeli policy of punishing the families of those who resist the occupation which include demolishing their parents homes, then Sharon will remove the sanctions on your territory, improve your living conditions under Israeli occupation and he might, in the distant future, consider negotiating with you on the 42% of 95% of 22% of 100% of the land which was originally yours.

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GOD (eternally):
Thou Shalt Not Covet